8 soft skills to fast-track your career:

May 12, 2023

  1. Make People Feel Important (SHR Method)
    Your formula to be charismatic:
    Seen
    • Give eye contact
    • Offer a specific compliment
    Heard
    • Ask good questions
    • Be interested, not interesting
    Remembered
    • Follow up
    • Remember name(s)
    • Recall something you discussed
  2. Hone Your Body Language (7-38-55 Rule)
    People will like/dislike your communication based on:
    • 7% words
    • 38% tonality and face
    • 55% body language
    Stand up straight, pull your shoulders back, make eye contact, smile, give a firm handshake….
    You will be dangerous.
  3. Master the 4-Bullet Update
    Powerful people are busy.
    (They might not remember what they asked you to do.)
    Give an update with this outline:
    • Here’s what you asked me to do
    • Here’s what I did
    • Here are the risks/blockers (if any)
    • If given more time, I’d do this
  1. Record and Study Your Speaking
    The best communicator I know told me her secret:
    She records her calls.
    Then she replays them and studies them (like an athlete watching a game film)
    You’ll cut ‘ums’ and “likes.’
    99.9% won’t do this. Be the outlier.
  1. Ask Rapport-Building Questions
    Your network is your net worth
    Build bonds with these Qs:
    • What neighborhood are you in?
    • Do you have any siblings/kids?
    • How’d you meet your partner? (if mentioned)
    • Any fun upcoming trips?
    Simple, but most people miss this.
  1. Send ‘Friday Highlights’
    If you’re new to a team, do this to build trust.
    Every Friday, send your supervisor(s) a short email.
    Two parts:

    1) Highlights from the prior week
    • Big tasks completed
    • People networked with
    • Extracurricular (like affinity groups)

    2) Upcoming activities for next week
    • Forward-looking big tasks and networking
    Friday Highlights will help you:
    • Build trust
    • Hold yourself accountable
    • Tactfully self-promote (perception is reality)
    • Have everything you need for self-reviews

  1. Don’t Complain or Gossip. Ever.
    Nobody likes to hear complaining
    So why do we do it ourselves?
    (Respectfully standing up for yourself is different.)
    Separately, when you talk badly about others, people wonder if you talk badly about them too.
    Just don’t do it.
  1. Remember ALL the Names
    A person’s favorite sound is their name.
    I have a theory about their 2nd favorite sound:
    The names of their loved ones and pets.
    Whenever you hear one mentioned, write it down.
    Later, ask by name about them.
    You will stand out.